The drive home last night passed by in the blink of an eye. Usually I get antsy around the 1 hour mark, but I had a million things on my mind and before I knew it, I was pulling into our driveway…and unloading the car….and cursing myself for having so much stuff…once again.
Before I left town, I realized I was completely famished. I needed fast food!
I made a quick stop at Whole Foods because I just couldn’t get my mind off that calamari from the other day.
This is hands down the best calamari I have ever tried. I don’t know how the texture is so soft. Wait, “soft” isn’t the right word. I want to say “non-rubbery,” but that doesn’t sound so appetizing, huh?
Maybe it’s the freshness of the calamari or the way they prepared it…? I must KNOW!
I will dream of this calamari for as long as I live.
I kept this salad under $5. Now that is what I call talent!
I woke up this morning and walked over to the gym. I ran 3 miles on the treadmill and ended with some leg weights (I left my upper body completely out of it today. Every single muscle from the waist up was sore and in knots from moving!). I cannot tell you the last time I ran 3 miles nonstop on the ‘mill. I wasn’t bored for a single second though and really wanted to continue running…
I’ll call that a success!
Random story [of my life]: The receptionist at our clubhouse scanned my card on my way in and said my access was denied. I asked her why and she said, It must be because you recently had a birthday. You have to get a new card when you turn 16.
Me [in my squeaky voice]: But I’m twenty…threeee…?
It wasn’t actually because of my age. Speaking of [not] looking my age though, I went through puberty way early, so when I was 13 I looked pretty much how I look now. Everyone thought I was 16 or 17. Now I’m 23 and people still think I’m 16 or 17. My mom calls me Benjamin Button 
.
Now to clarify my clarification from yesterday…
Sometimes, I’m hesitant to share the details of my life so publicly. That being said, I understand it comes with the territory of writing a blog and I just can’t avoid it sometimes.
Like I mentioned, I will not be working at the bakery after August.
I’ve had a wonderful time working there this summer. I’ve met and gotten to know some fabulous people. I didn’t know how long I was going to stay in Charlottesville when I went down. My intention was to stay at least several months. Unfortunately, the reality is I can’t afford to live in Charlottesville on what I’m making. A few unexpected things happened as well including rent increasing, other income source decreasing, etc.
With student loans knocking on my door every month, rent, and all those other lovely real life expenses, ends just aren’t meeting. Instead of making money, I’m essentially losing money [I don't have] by working there. The most logical option for me at this point is to live at home and save money. Have I mentioned how much I dislike the word ‘money?’
There are a few things I’m considering doing in the next 1-2 years including: 1) teaching English abroad 2) going back to school for a master’s degree in psychology 3) traveling to several countries 4) taking photography classes. I might not pursue any of them or I might pursue them all. Only time will tell. I don’t know yet what I’ll be doing come September…but that’s what August is for.
I know some of you may still have questions, but this is all I really want to share right now.
{ 74 comments… read them below or add one }
Teach English abroad! Other than the obvious benefits of this, it would truely help future money making job opportunitites!
Good luck on figuring it all out. I felt pulled in so many directions from 24-27 about what I wanted to do, it’s tough to decide. Teaching abroad sounds like a great opportunity and from everyone I know who’s done it, it has been.
you seem to have quite a few options, I hope things start to work themselves out soon and you will have a smooth time making decisions.
Oh Allie, don’t you worry. You don’t have to answer to us; only YOU (and maybe the parents too
) Thanks for opening up. I hope that your heart will SCREAM to you and tell you exactly what it wants! 
Happy Friday, Allie!
I completely understand your decision. I quit teaching high school because I hated it and took a job at Whole Foods. I cut my salary in half and my husband and I found ourselves living paycheck to paycheck for the first time ever. While I loved working there, I just couldn’t afford it, even with my husband making a very respectable salary. Now I’m waiting tables until I figure out what I want to do… Again!!! But the money is so much better, and I have no take home work in the mean time
good luck to you as you *try* to figure it out 
I’m graduating in a month… and I think it’s safe to say we are in a similar mindset! I’m still trying to convince my parents that teaching English abroad is a good idea. I really want to do it, always have, and I figure now is the time. I’m thinking about doing it in Istanbul, but I have a few friends who are teaching in South Korea and loving it.
Good luck Alli, and thanks for being so honest!
Ahh sorry I left the “e” of Allie. ha
I’d go with ‘tender’ to describe good calamari
And good luck figuring everything out, I’m sure you’ll enjoy whatever you decide on. I’m not quite at that decision point yet, but I’m getting more and more scared of having to make life decisions like these.
Yeah!! Tender was the word I was looking for. Thanks, Rachel!
Love the random photos to break it up!
It’s far better to stagnantly be 16 than to look waaaay older!
Thanks for sharing Allie! And I can totally relate right now with the student debt. It’s one of those mountains that’s just getting larger and larger with time and difficult to pay off until school is all done. It sounds like returning home was a tough decision but I trust that it’s the right one at the right time
Thanks for clearing that up and sharing with us, Allie! Hope we didn’t appear too nosy – there’s no judgment from me at any rate. Only curiousity.
I know my life has taken so many turns and twists since I graduated college too, you just never know what’s around the next corner. I wish you the best in whatever decision you make – always nice to have so many exciting options!
I had calamari for the first time the other day and I just didn’t like it at ALL. If I can find a nonrubbery selection at my Whole Foods, maybe that will change my mind.
I know it is sometimes hard to share personal stuff! Even though a blog is personal. Sometimes if i think about it too much i cringe a little on the inside. Good luck with your future endeavors! That sucks about the money situation but at least you got this experience! I am sure you will remember it forever
haha…Don’t feel awkward! There are plenty of people who feel like they are in limbo in their lives.I’m on the verge of 35 and contemplating many changes in the near future.I have a job which pays my mortgage,but I’ve come to realize there’s WAY more to life than that.You’re FABULOUS! Do what ya gotta do:-)cc
Thanks for explaining even though it wasn’t necessary.. . Don’t feel bad.. I swear I was in my late 20’s before I got anything in my life figured out.
My only advice is don’t go back to school unless you know what you really want to do. Otherwise your going to be completely over-educated and not have any job experience. I think you can figure it out. You know you love blogging, you know you love taking pictures, you know you want to travel. Make a career out of it!
Haha well, I don’t think I could have avoided it based on the questions I got on my last post. Thanks for your advice, Liz. Along with over-educated, I’ll be even poorer!
I love your interjected photos
And, to make you feel better, last year, when I was 21, I had a flight attendant ask me to move out of the exit row because you have to be 14 to sit there. Uhhhhh, what? hahah.
I thought you would
. I hope you got to stay there because the exit row rocks!
All of these choices sound amazing!! I know you’ll pick the one you love the most
People think I am younger than I am all the time. I am really short too so that just makes things alot worse! I was confused for a 14 year old a few weeks back…nice….
FINALLY I know what’s going on in your life!
You know I’ll keep reading
A lot of people I met while teaching abroad were paying back student loans — it’s a great option because (depending on where you go) you live rent-free and your only expenses are personal (groceries, although my school provided 2-3 meals a day), subway fare, etc. I’d be happy to give you more information!
Yeah, I’m looking at a program that would provide housing and give a stipend. Which program did you go through?
I recently did a Fulbright to teach in Taiwan, and the stipend was REALLY generous; in fact I came home with saved money (even while traveling to other places during my grant…). The application process can be a extensive–but most funded teaching abroad programs are, and I think if you discuss your accomplishments/goals as a food blogger you’d stand an AWESOME chance for any of the countries they offer!
I think that you had a great experience and probaby a really fun summer working at the bakery. Living on your own is tough while working ANY kind of job – I can only imagine how hard it was this summer!
I’ve had a lot of friends who have taught english abroad and they have loved it. After that they attended grad school. I even know someone who is working on a organic farm abroad in europe. Good Luck in whatever you decide.
Good to know! I thought about working on a farm last year…in Hawaii
I feel you! My life is in a similar predicament position- my parents are moving abroad, my little sister going to college and I need to figure out if I’m going to take a gamble finding a job in San Francisco or Portland or go to Finland and live RENT FREE in an apartment we own there and start a career out there. Ahhh. le sigh.
A WF salad under $5 IS talent!
Go to Finland (!!!).
I work at a college and constantly get asked “what’s your major?” I’ve been out of college for over 5 years now….and I’m married. And I have my master’s degree. Talk about awkward telling the parents of the students I’ll be helping that I’m in fact not a student!!!
ps- I love your comments on the pics! It definitely helped make it less awkward
Hahaha!
Nothing to feel awkward about!!!! When I was your age, I was sooo broke, and I eventually had to move back home, too!! And home for me was across the country!! It gets better!!
Haha I like the pictures.
You know I know where you’re coming from and that I wish I could tell you how to figure it out, but I wish I knew myself! Something will come your way soon, but in the meantime you have to keep on moving along and putting feelers out where you can.
Thanks, Susan! I need to visit NYC soon and bakery hop with you!
I didn’t see that you mentioned your Zevia drink in your post..how is it? I’ve seen it at Whole Foods a million times but never tried it. Would you recommend it?
I won a case of it in a giveaway and really liked it. I usually don’t drink soda because the aspartame makes my head swirl. I think regular soda drinkers wouldn’t think Zevia isn’t as good, but I think it’s delicious, if not better. I got cream soda the other day, which I had never tried before. It was a tad sweet for me but it did the trick.
Allie, thanks for clarifying. You have shared enough to keep your readers informed and also maintain some semblance of your own privacy. With that being said, as a long time reader, I am proud of your decision to move home and explore other avenues. There is nothing I love more than watching 2 of my favorite bloggers’ lives collide. But, in reality, you are a Duke graduate! You are clearly smart, talented, and have a lot to offer the world. Certainly you have more to offer than making sandwiches and doing the cash register at a bakery. (I’m not knocking Kath or Matt in any way! I follow KERF religiously and I very impressed with their business venture and work ethic with opening a GH.) You’re going to do great things! Glad to be along for the ride.
Thanks, Jess. Yes, that degree was a pricey one too!
Oh sweetheart, I am so proud of you regardless of what happens. You took a risk and did something so wonderful by helping Kath and Matt. I think it makes sense to move back home and get yourself more grounded. You’ll be so happy in the end.
Thanks for sharing it. I was curious but kind of hesitant to ask. I don’t keep a blog but definitely can understand how difficult it is to share your private part of life on the Internet. Whatever you choose to do, I am sure you will have great time doing them
I totally respect you not wanting to share too much – it’s definitely difficult to say something publicly when you’re not even sure what the future holds yourself! I say go with your heart and do what makes you the most happy and comfortable
hahaha!! That’s funny about the 16 story..but don’t feel bad, I’m ALWAYS accused of being in my teens. The most popular guess is 14. No kidding.
That calamari looks great! I don’t think I’ve ever had actual fresh calamari. It’s always been fried.
It’s SO good! Yes, it’s usually fried, but occasionally I see it grilled. When I do…I must have it!
I still get mistaken for a young teen too–guess we’re just a bunch of kids?
I can’t wait to see what the future holds for you Allie–I know you’ll excel at whatever you pursue:)
What is your secret to keeping your WF salad so cheap!? I had my first WF salad bar experience yesterday and mine came to like $15. YIKES!
I totally understand your reasons for moving home – watching your money go down the drain in Cville must be hard! But at least you had a fun experience working for K&M this summer!
You have to reach for the lightweights! Tofu is pretty heavy. Try not to get stuff that is just filled with water like cucumbers and tomatoes. ALSO, shake of the juice/water if you can!
Good luck with everything Allie! I’m struggling majorly financially too..if only money DID grow on trees..ugh.
I’m sure whatever you choose to do though, you’ll be great! Everything will work out. =)
Ahh that age thing happens to me ALL.THE.TIME. haha. My sister is 6 years younger than me and everyone either thinks we’re twins or she’s my older sister. I’ve already graduated from college, almost have my masters, and people still think I’m in high school. I guess it’s a good thing though, or at least that’s what everyone tells me haha.
Good luck with everything! The 4 future plans you listed all sound awesome!
1) I’m so impressed your WF salad was under $5. That’s talent.
2) Love the random pictures to break up the text.
3) I think all of your life options for September sound awesome. You can totally do whatever you put your mind to! You’ll get through it all!
Allie, you will succeed in whatever you do. I hope all your plans will become reality!! I wish you the best of luck!!
I liked the “random picture to break up the text.”
Thanks for being willing to share as much as you do! If you’re interested, I have one friend who teaches english in South Korea, as well as another friend who teaches at an American School in Kuwait. Both LOVE it (I’ve personally been to Kuwait and it was fantastic!). If you’re interested in chatting with them about it, just send me a message! Happy planning your life! 
Kuwait, really?! That sounds like an adventure of a lifetime. Could you email me their contact info? Thank you!
Ugh I can so relate. I just want to KNOW WHAT TO DO! Somebody tell me!
I’ve thought of teaching English abroad too. Where should we go?
You got to try something different and learn new things…that makes it worth it! Can’t wait to see where life takes you next!
I feel like a lot of people go through the stage you’re at… I mean, I’m only 29 so I’m not trying to act all old and wise or anything but I know I had that time in my life. It was kind of a make-it-or-break-it year for me at 23. I had graduated college and still didn’t know wtf to do. I pulled a 180 compared to what my major was and it all worked out and I have a fantastic career… I say just go with whatever your gut tells you to
I know, I know, advice I’m sure you’ve never before heard in your life lol. the important thing is that no matter what you do, you have such supportive family behind you!!!! I can’t imagine what that’s like!! Go for whatever you want to do and if it doesn’t work out… I’m sure they’ll still be there to help you try again 
I’m in the same boat…people always think I am waaaay younger than I actually am!
Better than the other way around I suppose! We’ll thank our genes when we’re 50
Allie, you are such a gifted writer and photographer. Your blog is so creative, inspiring and funny – I actually do LOL (not just type that I am!) I wish you all the luck in the world on your next adventure. Good Luck!!
Thanks, Kristin!
I’m 23, too and earning my Master’s in Counseling, but I always have days where I think “what the hell do I want to DO with my life?!” I wouldn’t feel bad about not sharing things on your blog; it’s 100% yours and you choose what to share. I feel awkward sharing things too – like, where do you draw the line? I use the “if I wouldn’t tell a stranger I meet on the street…” mentality when it comes to what I will/won’t post
I am sorry the bakery didn’t work out for you, you seemed so excited in the beginning.
One would think the constant do-gooders Kath and Matt would pay their employees enough to survive…
Allie, I really admire your honesty, partially because I’m in the same boat!
Student Loans=no fun. Nonprofits=fun, but not when it comes to student loans.
I’m heading back ‘home’ in December, 1 1/5 years after graduating. I like to think it’s just a holding place until we figure out the next step!
I think this can be seen as a great opportunity to do something new and try something else out! you don’t have to have it all figured out right now! I did your #1, 2 (masters in social work -I’m now a therapist and run a child obesity prevention program and LOVE it) and #3 within a few years of graduating. the horrible word “money” is NEVER going to go away! I have a friend now who taught in Luxembourg and is now teaching in Tokyo and has LOVED both places. I’d be happy to give her your info if you have questions! Good luck and thanks for sharing!
Your job seems incredibly rewarding! I’d love your friend’s contact info, thanks!
Oh boy, I know exactly how that feels to look younger than you are. I’m 20 and one day in May when I swiped my ID card at my gym, the woman behind the desk told me to wait because she had to check my birthday information. She then said “Ok, I just needed to make sure you’re not cutting school. You look sooo…sixteen.”
UGGGG!
I was told this weekend that I look 12 years old… I’m 19. haha. Still young, I know… but definitely not 12! So I feel your pain.
Aww Allie! I can definitely see how it becomes hard to juggle how much to reveal to your readers. It’s not like you can really get away with NOT saying anything because readers will notice if you stop posting about the bakery, but at the same time, I’m sure sometimes you just want to live your life and write a food blog without disclosing your personal life.
All of your options sound like good ones. That’s the nice thing about being young, smart, and having the support of our parents, huh? There are lots of things we could do. Have you ever considered waitressing? It could bring in a lot of money as you look for something more “permanent,” and I’m sure your bakery experience would give you a boost. The hours are pretty flexible too, and you seem to love that
Good luck Allie
you should email me sometime so we can catch upppppp
Rosalie!! I’ve missed you! I waitressed the summer before sophomore year and LOVED it! I might do that again in the near future. And yes, may this be a lesson to all tweens/teens out there…be nice to your parents!
I’m just here to say DEAR GOD, DO NOT GET AN MA IN PSYCH! lol.
Basically, I have a BA in psych myself, I work in academia, and my BFF has a MA in clinical psych. She hasn’t been able to find a job in CHICAGO (read: tons of jobs there) for literally the past 2 years since she got her degree. Oh and it cost her about $50,000. If you think the job market is tough with your BA, just get that psych MA and TRY to get a job – it won’t happen. Main problem is that everyone with lots of experience has been laid off like crazy (they’ve been first to be cut), so the market is flooded with experienced people. So if you really think you want to go that route, you need to seriously research the jobs you think you’ll be able to get afterwards. My BFF has been looking for work all across the midwest & east coast, and the best she’s even interviewed for was a job that paid $15/hour and was so bad that the guy interviewing her kept saying things like “we have high turnover” and “hope you like paperwork!”
In my opinion, it’s not worth getting a Master’s in anything unless you know EXACTLY what you’re going to get out of it in the end. Job experience is much more educational than actual education, if you don’t know what you’re doing with the degree.
Now, having said all that… I have had the most success with my psych BA by working at universities doing research. You don’t need to do research, of course, but there’s always openings at universities due to retirements etc, and the pay & benefits are generally pretty good.
I know it’s a really tough market out there, so good luck, and I hope you figure out what’s best for you!
Thank you so much for the advice, Sara. I really appreciate it! I will definitely do my research (no pun intended!) before diving in. The last thing I want is to limit my job opportunities!
I’m sooo behind on blog reading. Booo to have to stop working at the bakery! Maybe they’ll mail you scraps?! I vote for going back to school (if you can get good funding) or taking photography classes!
Girl, I taught in Bangkok and it was the best experience OF MY LIFE. If I wasn’t married right now and unable to go back over, I would in a heartbeat. I just finished grad school and am feeling kind of lost again, so I feel ya. And random, but I met a few Duke grads over in Thailand. As a UNC alum we didn’t always get along
, but they were great friends!
Awww I did miss this post. Allie I can relate to you the same way. My boyfriend is in the Army and the only way this relationship would work is if I made the move because I know he could never move to Las Vegas. I moved to Texas and now Georgia.. and guess what! I’m going BACK home to Las Vegas because he is getting deployed again. I’m very fortunate, just like you to have family that will take you back and support you for anything you decide to do in the future. I moved all my stuff I owned and now I gotta move it back. Talk about an expense. I only work in retail and the pay doesn’t pay much, that is basically my grocery money for the weeks. It is so frustrating now finding something better or getting a job you know you will love with a good pay. You are a strong woman and I know something will come knocking at your door. I’d say enjoy your time, being 23 and being glad you don’t have worst problems then some other people. I’m 25 and that is what I live by. I thought my life be different at this point but it is the complete opposite. Dang the army that owns my boyfriend!
Oh Fallon, that sounds like a rough situation. If I’ve learned anything in my short life it’s that life doesn’t ever work out quite like we expect it to. You are a good woman for sticking with your boyfriend. I’m sure he appreciates it! I wish you the best!
Hi Allie,
I completely sympathize with having to turn down a job that doesn’t cover your bills. When I first delved into the teaching industry with no experience, I was offered a position as a teacher’s assistant in a first grade classroom. Despite having a Master’s Degree from a great school, I knew there was value to be gained in working with a veteran teacher for a year (even though I was ultimately hoping to work in Middle School, not Elementary School). It was for a public school in an affluent suburb, and yet the job paid $14,500 PER YEAR. A full time sub makes $18,000 for the same hours. Needless to say, I had to decline the position and hope to get something more lucrative (I say that semi-facetiously given that we’re talking about education).
Thankfully, it all worked out, as I’m sure it will for you. Good luck, girl!